When you decide to begin a journey, the only stumbling block before you is the question 'when'. If you decide to begin your journey the moment you decide about the journey, you have achieved half of what you deserve. The other half comes to you if you have the determination to persevere in your journey. Every journey has a beginning. Beginnings are important because they set the mood, the course and the end of the journey. That is why they say, 'well begun is half done'.
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When I was part of the Society of Jesus, I used to meditate everyday. It was part of the discipline of the Society. Spirituality was personal responsibility, but discipline was external till you were considered an adult in spirituality. So I meditated when the bell rang. After I left the Society to live as an ordinary human being in the society, I realized that meditations need not start when a bell rang. After a while, I stopped meditating altogether. I found that life was fruitful and happy if one concentrated in one's daily routine with dedication. I was happy to work, happy to earn, happy to spend what I earned, happy to save some wealth, happy to love, happy to share. I was happy. I didn't need to meditate to be happy.
Life went on happily like this for about ten years. Just the other day, I got to think about the meaning of life. As always, I gave prime importance to happiness. I was and am happy. I have a family, I have love, I have decent savings, I live a decent life, I earn respect, and I have material possessions to live happily. But, when I thought about the depth of that happiness, I found that my happiness could be deeper, fuller and stronger. I found that I could do better if I knew myself better. I realized that I needed to get in touch with my own self in a better manner.
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So I got back to meditation. Yesterday, when I meditated after a long time, I used some peaceful music to support my concentration. Also, I made sure that I didn't pray. Prayer is useless when there is no conviction of its usefulness. So I sat down, listened to music and concentrated on my breathing. It was wonderful. After 15 minutes when the music stopped, I felt relaxed and reset. I knew then that I would meditate again.