Most people often think that it is ok to be not ok. Because, it is not unusual to be not ok. In my experience, life is a series of healing processes because getting hurt is the order of the day. Anyone with the least sense of self worth will then look inwards to help one’s own self.
How can I help me? Heard no one saying ever! Everyone says, “How can I help you?” We are all trained to say ‘how can I help you?’ Because we are all taught to take care of the other. Not because they need help, but because you may perceive that they might require some help. See the generosity of our altruism! However, when it comes to your own self, my culture tells me to shut up and go on. Because, to be worried about your own self, to worry about your mental health and well being is less than being human. Who does that! If you are a decent human being, take care of others. Others will take care of you. Well, life has taught me otherwise. If I don’t take care of myself, no one else will.
When do you realise that you need help? When you think you need help, you might already have gone beyond rescue. That is not your problem. That is the problem of your society. You have been taught all along to hush your own need to feel well and go after what others think is good for you. Therefore, by the time you get a chance to look inside and realise that you need help, you might be beyond redemption. So the message is, every now and then, if possible after you read this sentence, look in the mirror and ask yourself, ‘do you need help?’ And if the answer is ‘no’ definitely run to someone who can help you.
Who can help you? What kind of help will help me get better, feel better? This is a question that stops most of us when we feel we need help. Quite understandable. First of all, getting help is looked down upon. Second, finding help raises many an eyebrow. Third, how can you live your decent life after getting help for your mental illness? Therefore, if you really think you need help, decide that you are going to give two big hoots about what others think. Second, walk up to whoever it is you think can help and ask for help. Third, walk out and look straight in the eyes of the society and give those two hoots!
Feelings apart, you could start by talking to a counsellor. A counsellor is someone who listens to you and guides you as to how to respond to life’s many turns and twists. If a counsellor judges that you are beyond their purview, they will guide you to the next level of help. We all need to understand that what we call sanity is a fine balance of thousands of chemicals that our brain produces every second. When one of those chemicals is produced in the minusculest amount, we become unwell. Some of that balance can be controlled by controlling the mind and creating a conducive environment. Some of it should be controlled using other chemicals that can control the glands that create these chemicals. Therefore, we might require help from a clinical psychologist or psychiatrist.
If you regularly take your car to service Center without feeling ashamed of your car being called weak, immature, nuts and crazy, why would you hesitate to walk into any place that offers you help, solace and ultimately a peaceful existence? Get help while it is not too late.
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